Spreading Peace One Relationship at a Time How to Reach Agreement Without Compromise The very principle behind compromise suggests that it is necessary to give something up in order to get something else, so loss or defeat is an intrinsic aspect of the process. Each one wants to reach a place of agreement (hopefully!) and so each party gives some of their desires up to accommodate their partner, and try to reach a working decision or solution. There is nothing wrong
with this approach, but it is very different from ours. We do not use compromise for making decisions and reaching agreement. Instead, we have found a process by which neither of us winds up giving anything up. Neither does one of us wind up getting “their way”, as it were. Learn more on this week's blog. Successful Relationship Reading Corner Although we have a
very different viewpoint than many of the people who write to this topic, here are some articles that are in consonance with our message.
Compromise: Is there an Alternative? "It all starts with the
notion that what I perceive to be "true" is both real and complete - as if I had the smallest chance of knowing all there is to know about life"
Never Compromise: 3 Steps to Synergy in Your Relationship "When you compromise, you are giving up what feels
important to you and this doesn’t always foster a sense of connection and cooperation in your relationship.... Writer and teacher Stephen Covey talks about the power of synergy.... Synergy, according to Covey, is all about being open to creating a solution that is even better than what either you or I propose. It is not about deciding whether “your way” or “my way” is best and then cobbling out some compromise in the middle. It is all about really hearing one another and creating a third
way"
TO COMPROMISE OR NOT TO COMPROMISE: How to build sustainable relationships "Many popular psychologists, such as Dr. Phil,
preach that compromise is the key to resolving relationship conflict and essential to building sustainable relationships. They view compromise as a “win-win” solution where both people get some of what they want. However, counsellors who hold this perspective tend to act more like arbiters than counsellors, pressing people to compromise regardless of the psychological issues that fuel people’s conflicts in the first
place."Let Kit and Kat Relationship Experts Make You Famous We are looking for photos for guest cat appearances on Kit and Kat: Relationship Experts on Youtube. If your cat has problems and needs advice, please send photos to philandmaude@philandmaude.com Spreading peace one relationship at a time, Phil and Maude
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