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Spreading Peace One Relationship at a Time

A topic that is basic to having a successful relationship is individuality: seeing your partner as a complete and separate individual, and honoring and celebrating them for that fact.

This one understanding leads to almost all the other elements of relating without conflict. The source of much conflict is the uneasy feeling that you are both adversaries, a feeling which arises from the lack of safety and complete trust in a partner. But once you have affirmed that you and your partner match in the area of core values, you can practice a respect for the other and an understanding that although you are both there to support each other as completely as possible, this does not involve changing or altering the other person. Read more in this week's blog.

Successful Relationship Reading Corner
Here are some articles on maintaining your individuality in a relationship.

Relationship Success: Balancing Togetherness and Individuality "A client of mine -- during our initial consultation -- said the following: "Here's my issue. When I'm in a relationship, I invest so much of myself into maintaining romance and intimacy that I forget who I am as an individual. How can I balance my personal identity with my identity as a couple?"

Boundaries in Relationships "When two people come together, each with a clear definition of her or his own individuality, the potential for intimacy and commitment can be astounding. The similarities between two people may bring them together, but their differences contribute to the growth, excitement and mystery of their relationship."

Individuality "A healthy relationship supports each partner’s growth and development as an individual.... treat individuality as a vital part of relating. Far from being a threat to closeness, honoring individuality allows relationships to be rich and full."

10 Scientifically Proven Ways To Be A Good Spouse The author offers her wedding vows and the reasons behind them: 1. "I promise to respect, admire, and appreciate you for who you are, as well as for the person you wish to become." 2. "I promise to support and protect your freedom; because although our lives are intertwined, your choices are still yours alone."

In our blog from last week, we wrote about How to be Successful in Your Relationship: Good Communication. Kit and Kat have something to say about that as well.
Spreading peace one relationship at a time,
Phil and Maude
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