When there is something we need to agree on, whether it be a decision we have to make or a problem that needs to be resolved, we have found a way of dealing with it that does not involve any struggle or
conflict.
Our approach is simple but very effective. We start by speaking in turn, offering our thoughts and feelings about the situation. Each of us listens and tries to understand the other, rather than defensively preparing counter-arguments.
A willingness to change and a belief that other positions are possible are both critical to this process. Our intention is to be
together and to reach a solution or decision that is mutual. We are both fully present with each other, and neither of us has a predetermined answer. By hearing each other and being open, new ideas arise, and for each of us, our landscape of possibilities expands until we meet at a solution that neither of us imagined at the start. A new creation has emerged; something that is the product of both of us together, rather than from just one of us alone. “How Two: Have a Successful Relationship”
At the heart of successfully resolving issues and conflicts is – no surprise – communication.
Before you can have full and free flowing communication, you have to have
full acceptance. We’ve covered that extensively elsewhere, so let’s take that as a given. And you need to talk one at a time and practice active listening.
Using this process requires the desire and follow through to get to know and understand yourself.
We're excited to share with you an audio interview that we did with Dr. Gail Brenner "Bringing Peace to the World—One Relationship at a Time." We think you'll really enjoy it - read and listen to it here.
Kit and Kat Relationship Experts For those of you who haven't yet seen our Kit and Kat videos, here's one from the series for your edification and enjoyment. Look around on our Youtube channel for more in this series. Phil and Maude’s Friday Feature: Core Values We recently had the pleasure of writing an article for Older Dating, a site which is dedicated
to helping older singles meet new people all across the UK. This site offers lots of helpful articles by an array of dating and relationship experts aimed at helping people over 40 create successful relationships. Successful Relationship Reading Corner This week's blog is on how to communicate in your relationship and getting to know
yourself. Here are some articles discussing this topic.
We've linked to this first article before, but it is so to the point that we're including it again.
9 Steps to
Better Communication Today "The most popular myth about communication in relationships is that since you talk to your partner, you’re automatically communicating. While talking to your partner is indeed a form of communication, if it’s primarily about everyday, “surfacey” topics (“How were the kids?” “How was work?” “How’s your mother?”), you’re not really communicating about the important stuff. This article is primarily about how to talk in a more open and rewarding manner with your
significant other."
Healthy Relationships "Open, honest communication should be part of every healthy relationship. Use the guidelines below to open up the channels of communication between you and your
partner"
8 Tips For Communicating Better in Relationships "All of us who have relationships have struggled with communication. It comes in friendships, family relationships,
romantic relationships, and work relationships, to name the main ones. But each of these relationships are in our lives so we can learn how to be better communicators, and thus not only express ourselves effectively but learn how to meet others' needs and get our needs met as well."
Spreading peace one relationship at a time, Phil and Maude If you are interested in newsletters you've missed, see our archive. |
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