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Optimism Makes Your Life Better

Maude is off with the grandkids during Coachella, so I (Phil) wrote this week's blog. I think optimism is an essential part of a happy life and a happy relationship, and I want to share several aspects of my past to illustrate why.

When I was younger I trashed several good relationships by repeatedly being dissatisfied, leaving, feeling alone to the point of physical pain, getting back together and then repeating the cycle. (I’ve since apologized.) The part of this story that’s relevant is my dissatisfaction. They weren’t smart enough or as beautiful as other women on the street. They didn’t dress stylishly; they were irrational; they spent time drinking tea in the kitchen instead of coming to bed.

I approach life differently now. I wish I could describe some huge epiphany, but no; it changed around me the way today’s pre-dawn sun is making the lamp-light unnecessary.

Click here and read what changed, or listen to me reading it here.

Optimism is a political act.” Alex Steffen
Optimism doesn't wait on facts. It deals with prospects. Pessimism is a waste of time.” Norman Cousins
I'm not interested in blind optimism, but I'm very interested in optimism that is hard-won, that takes on darkness and then says, 'This is not enough.'” Colum McCann

Successful Relationship Reading Corner


In this week's blog, Phil writes about optimism in life and relationships. Here are some links that are clear about the benefits of an optimistic outlook.

The Benefits of Looking on the Bright Side: 10 Reasons to Think Like an Optimist "Having a cheery disposition can influence more than just your mood. "People who are optimistic are more committed to their goals, are more successful in achieving their goals, are more satisfied with their lives, and have better mental and physical health when compared to more pessimistic people," says Suzanne Segerstrom, PhD, a professor of psychology at the University of Kentucky. Research shows that people tend to be optimistic by nature, but what if you're naturally more of an Eeyore?"

How Hope and Optimism Affects Romantic Relationships "What role do hope and optimism play in romantic relationships? What happens when hope fluctuates or when one partner is more optimistic than the other? The work of Eshkol Rafaeli, the professor of psychology at Bar-Ilan University, looks deeper at how hope works for couples, especially as they have their first child."

Matchmaking Tips: How Optimism can Improve your Relationship "For years, relationship gurus, psychologists and matchmakers have recommended more optimism in relationships. Couples who proactively practice an optimistic attitude are happier, more willing to try new things, and not afraid of what the future holds. Thinking on the bright side might seem impossible, especially if one or both of you are not optimistic by nature. Don’t worry! Our matchmakers have compiled a guide to help you harness the power of optimism and bring it into your budding relationship."

Spreading peace one relationship at a time
Phil and Maude
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