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How to Practice Acceptance in Your Relationship

Last week we blogged about active listening. This week we would like to share from our book, How Two: Have a Successful Relationship,  which includes a conversation on acceptance, active listening and compromise.

Acceptance Does Not Mean Compromise

Often when people think about the issue of acceptance, they think it is about compromise. Compromise is the act of giving up something to get something else. It assumes that there are different sides, and that one must settle in order to avoid conflict. It does not allow for the possibility that a resolution can be found, a resolution where, instead of giving up or changing something, you can create a solution that was not originally imaginable to either person. Without putting down compromise or its benefits, we are discussing a different path – one that is not about giving up on some part of yourself, your wants and perhaps even needs, but rather a path that, by acting in union, allows you to find new mutual solutions.


A Conversation

Maude: We’ve often talked about the fact that we don’t see acceptance the same as the word compromise. While not really putting down compromise.
Phil: Yeah, the peculiar thing is that we seem to have found a way to agreement without either of us having to compromise, and it’s a very mysterious process because neither of us compromise at all and yet we reach somewhere that works for both of us.

Click here to read the important details of this conversation 
or Listen to Maude and Phil talking.

Successful Relationship Reading Corner


This week's blog discusses acceptance, compromise and active listening, so we're offering some links with views on all three topics.

Is ‘Radical Acceptance’ the Key to a Lasting Relationship? "I believe radical acceptance is the key to making a relationship not only work — but thrive. It’s been the key to making my relationship with Sanjay incredibly deep and rewarding. So, what is radical acceptance? Radical acceptance means loving someone fully for who he or she really is — flaws, short-comings, weaknesses, warts, and all. It signifies loving someone without judgment. It is love filled with empathy and compassion."

11 Ways That Active Listening Can Help Your Relationships "When you listen correctly, you also learn more.... Some individuals put on a blank stare that can only be described as their "screen-saver face" (in the words of one of my colleagues). You know what that screen-saver face looks like: it's that blank stare in which the eyes are dull and looking blankly into nowhere and the face has absolutely no expression on it at all."

The Hidden Cost of Too Much Compromise in Your Relationship "Who hasn't heard about the importance of compromise in a relationship? But how often do we hear about the price that is paid for that compromise? In a relationship of significance, most people do things that are accommodating. But what happens when that behavior becomes passive behavior and is over-accommodating? What happens when you deny, suppress or repress a meaningful portion of yourself?"

Spreading peace one relationship at a time
Phil and Maude
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