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The Best Way to Support Your Partner

What are we to make of Mrs. Doasyouwouldbedoneby and Mrs. Bedonebyasyoudid, the two mysterious characters who appear at critical junctures in “The Water-Babies” by Charles Kingsley? They are symbols of how we respond to other people. Mrs. Bedonebyasyoudid is about karma. If what you did was bad, it’s about retribution, punishment, vengeance. It looks to the past for what happens today. It is a cause and effect model; you have no choice in the matter.

Mrs. Doasyouwouldbedoneby is the opposite of all of these. It places agency and responsibility in your hands. It is about what happens now and in the future. It is about free will. It ignores the past, and by so doing, implies a letting go of grievances.
What are some of the bigger principles of peaceful relating? What is the true meaning of being together in this way? What possibilities does this create?

When a relationship has as its basis total acceptance and an understanding that each person is totally unique, it creates a very specific type of being together and creates a different kind of energy than when partners are pushing or pulling at each other to change, or to become more like each other.

When you are fully accepted and when the differences between you and your partner are celebrated as an enrichment rather than being seen as a threat or obstaclethe level of relaxation and empowerment that happens is exponential.

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Successful Relationship Reading Corner


BookshelfIn this week's blog, we discussed the best way to support your partner. Here are some other writers' thoughts about this.

5 Essentials to Having a Healthy Relationship "Everyone deserves to be in a healthy, loving relationship and with the right person by your side, a healthy relationship is completely attainable. If you want to be that #relationshipgoals couple, here are 5 essentials for having a healthy relationship."

What It Really Means to Have a Supportive Partner "Let me ask you a question. When was the last time you felt supported? When was the last time you felt safe, at home, encouraged, and able to be 100 percent yourself? If your partner creates a safe space for you to do this, then you are truly blessed. If not, have you ever wondered why you don’t feel safe, supported, and loved? ... I didn’t need someone who would wallow in self-pity and negativity with me, as previous partners of mine had done. I needed someone who would inspire me to be the best person I could be and show me that if I picked myself up, everything would work out just fine."

Want a Better Relationship? Ask Your Partner This Question "'How are you feeling?' In eight years of marriage, it was the question Sunshine Spoils Milk blogger Kimberly Zapata never thought to ask her husband. The duo had been together since they were high school sweethearts clutching hands in the hallway. Then one day, in their early 30s, they found themselves sitting across from a marriage counselor. Zapata was convinced the marriage was over."
 





Spreading peace one relationship at a time
Phil and Maude
 
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