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What Lies at the Core of Successful Relationships

Acorn seedlingWe write on many aspects of relationships, hoping to offer you new ways that you can put into practice in your relationship. These different ideas all tie together in our underlying principles.

Our first book contained one statement illustrated in many ways: simply stated, a relationship without conflict and embedded in peace is possible and we know this because we experience it. If we do, then so can you.

Many people asked for more specifics about how this was possible, so we looked closely at how we acted with each other, and this led to our second book, How Two: Have a Successful Relationship. We were promoting the very radical idea that conflict is not inevitable in a relationship.

We live a conflict-free relationship. It’s been more than a decade now full of peace, love, joy and passion. Friends check in with us every so often: “So you still haven’t had any arguments?” The answer is always “No.”
 
One of the primary things necessary to have this experience is to believe it is possible. An obstacle to this is the belief that conflict is inevitable within a relationship. This myth has become so insidiously inculcated in today’s culture that most people take it as a normal part of relating. In fact, many relationship experts extol the virtues of arguing and conflict, and praise all the good that will come of embracing and working through these problems.
 
“Nonsense!” we say to all of this. Open your minds and your hearts to another way. We are living proof that it is possible to love without hardship and difficulty. How Two: Have a Successful Relationship



Since the publication of that book, we have blogged regularly on the components and mechanisms of this type of living together and relating. Our understanding has evolved. We used to talk about conflict-free relationships, but now, instead of looking at our experience in terms of what it is not, we speak about the quality of peace. This change of focus makes clear how much peace is a visceral experience for us, and we’re hoping it will become one for you, too.

We may appear to be writing about couples’ relationships, but it is our firm belief that the ideas apply to all relationships – personal, familial and social. It is clear to us that peace in the world arises directly from peace between people, and we promote it both through the idea and the direct experience. Join us in this endeavor, and we cherish your sharing of your own experiences.

Our Vision Statement

Spreading Peace One Relationship at a Time

  1. Loving peaceful relationships exist. We have one.
  2. Peace is a tangible reality. It can be experienced and spread.
  3. Our vision is to share how people can relate to each other peacefully.
Tell us what you think by leaving a comment on our blog, and listen to Phil reading this.

EntheoMedicine Event

EntheoMedicine Event Poster

Another EntheoMedicine Event is coming up on March 23rd at Unity Church. In addition to these two speakers, Michael Gilbert has been added to the bill. Michael is a Harvard MBA, distinguished author, former President and Board Member of the Albert Hofmann Foundation and a Senior Fellow of USC's Annenberg Center for the Digital Future. An MDMA expert, he'll be sharing the latest research on the therapeutic uses of MDMA and the current progress towards legalizing it. He will deliver his talk immediately before the evening's Q&A discussion.

You can get tickets at https://entheomedicine.org/ and use PhilAndMaude15 to get a 15% discount.


Successful Relationship Reading Corner


BookshelfIn this week's blog, we asked what lies at the core of successful relationships. Some authors get it! Here are three.

Beware Of Mistaken Marriage Advice That "All Couples Fight" "Stressful situations that are becoming adversarial between loving partners can escalate into ever more stressful arguments.  Alternatively, they can be handled with calm, productive, collaborative talking together that dissipates stress and yields creation of mutually comfortable solutions."

5 Ways To Create More Harmony In Your Relationships "If you want to create more peace in your relationships, it starts with your relationship with yourself. The relationship of your dreams, where there’s authentic connection and you feel loved, accepted, and honored just as you are is completely possible when you realize that it starts with YOU. ... Here are a few practices that will help you tame the monkey mind and create more peace, harmony, and connection with yourself and in your relationships."

5 Top Tips to Enhance Relationships and Find Inner Peace "We all have challenges in our relationships at some time or other. If you are having relationship problems, you wouldn't be having them if you weren't having them with yourself. It all starts with you, being at peace with yourself! You cannot expect to have peace with others, never mind even thinking of having a healthy relationship when you have turmoil inside of you."

 

Spreading peace one relationship at a time
Phil and Maude
 
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