Reviews
Reviews of “How Two: Have a Successful Relationship”
In the 114-page book, based on real life experience, the couple cover an amazing array of topics such as:
• How to find mutual solutions to decision making and problem solving
• How to remain an individual within the relationship
• How to break the vicious cycle of anger and recrimination
• How to avoid the pitfalls that create separation and estrangement
• How to keep that original loving connection to your partner.
“Acceptance is basic to the process, but by that we don’t mean compromise,” said Mr. Mayes, 75. “Compromise is the act of giving up something to get something else. It assumes that there are different sides and that one must settle in order to avoid conflict.”
The couple have a favorite way of describing total acceptance of the other, of who and how they are. They refer to it as The 100 percent Factor, which is described in the book:
“Imagine you are barefoot on a dance floor. When you know that there is nothing on the floor, no thumbtacks or other dangerous items, you can be free to dance about, flying through the air, unmindful of where you come down. As soon as you introduce a single thumbtack anywhere on the floor, you are no longer able to leap and prance freely. You must always be careful you don’t come down on the tack and injure yourself. This very knowledge inhibits you all the time, even if it’s just a little bit.
“It is the same within relationships. The more thumbtacks that appear in the exchange, the more you must be careful, defended, withdrawn, on alert. Once you reach the threshold of 100 percent, your mind is not busy with whether the person is right or wrong, or needs changing or adjusting. Instead, when you accept yourself and the other and go forward in the freedom that this way of being brings, it creates an exquisite experience of peace and joy.”
Excerpt from Santa Barbara News-Press articleHow Two: Have a Successful Relationship by Phil and Maude Mayes is a useful guide for all those who are looking to build a peaceful and loving relationship in their lives, devoid of ugly fights and arguments, and how they can accept and tolerate each other’s personal space without finding it difficult. The book is excellent for transformation and gives good suggestions to find mutual solutions to problem solving – not to lose one’s individuality while in a relationship, how to remain in love always, and how to break free from anger and other negative emotions. Reading this book paves the way to a peaceful relationship filled with intimacy, respect, and acceptance.
The authors handle the topic with expertise and speak about it extensively, making it easy for readers to look into the tips and techniques and apply these in their personal lives. The book is not only for couples, but also to improve on family ties and friendships as it makes readers examine relationships with a new perspective. The book also gives one the confidence to interact with others in a good way, without having to change one’s behavior and values.
The acceptance, recognition, and celebration of one’s partner’s individuality help one to create a positive experience in life. The conversations shared by the authors also throw light on the importance of peace in every relationship, spreading harmony and joy. I found the book insightful and informative and, if the simple facts and truths mentioned in it can be practiced, everyone will be able to take their relationships to a different level.
Reviewed by Mamta Madhavan for Readers’ FavoritePhil and Maude know what it takes to have a successful and fulfilling relationship. In their new book, ‘How Two: Have a Successful Relationship’, they use honest, real life examples that actually work for couples wanting to create harmony and deep satisfaction in their relationship. If you are looking to finally establish true acceptance, intimacy, and a lifelong connection in your relationship, their book is a great read.
Michael Fiore, Digital Romance
Phil and Maude actually live in a conflict-free relationship. Now they’ve written a book that offers up their secrets to the rest of us. I laud and celebrate this generous gift to me and to couples all over the world.
William Weil, host of the Conscious Couples Conversations podcast
Reviews of “Secrets of a Successful Relationship Revealed”
Your book is the best on communication in relationships. I love the honoring of each other, the wisdom and the approach.. I am re-reading this book over and over.. It comes from the true place of loving.
Denise Lumiere
I have read the little book and it is lovely. I love the format and the way you have chosen to tell the story. The honesty and ideas will resonate and be helpful universally.
Dr. Jane Sandbank
This book is a useful exploration and dialog on the possibility of conflict-free relating. My partner of 20 years and I read it aloud to each other. We used the concepts as a springboard for deep discussions about our own relationship style, and found that they helped us to improve our communication skills and enhance the quality of our love and respect for each other’s individuality.
Jenny Phelps and Richard Niles
This is a wonderful book. It’s about selflessness (as opposed to the selfishness which so often characterizes relationships). It’s about achieving a level of communication which enables a true sharing of the best of each other’s qualities while respecting differences. It’s about learning how to “act in the living present” (to borrow a line from a Longfellow poem). And, it is so much more, because it is not the usual manual of “how to have a successful relationship.” Instead, it gives the reader a window to experience the authors’ personal intimate exchanges, letting one feel as though having traveled with them. It is a very good read.
Sam Redman
As you read along you recognize that peaceful feeling that comes from the sharing of loving acceptance, and you know that that’s where you want to be. Phil and Maude paint a picture of what that means by sharing views of their relationship from a variety of vantage points, and you come away with the thought that anyone can have this experience of peace if they can open themselves to it.
Dr. Les Elkind
Your book “Secrets of a Successful Relationship Revealed” is such a delight. I’m enjoying your intelligent and earnest way of communicating with each other. Thanks for sharing your intimate and beautiful union with the rest of us. As I read, I hear your voices taking one part or the other and so the book becomes very alive for me.
Myra Mossman