Acceptance is Not About Compromise

Often when people think about the issue of acceptance, they think it is about compromise. I am not berating compromise or its benefits, just pointing out that what we are discussing is a different path. This path is not about compromise, or about giving up on some part of yourself, your wants and perhaps even needs. It is about examining what is of real meaning and value to you and asking yourself some internal questions. This approach calls for you to look at your responses and separate the wheat from the chaff as it were. Which things that you react to, really mean something to you? How much of your responses are left over from another time or another relationship? Do you still want to hold onto those things for yourself? Do you want this person you are with to be a distinct and different individual or are you looking for agreement and verification of your self in them? Are you challenged or stimulated by a different approach to the same goal? These kinds of questions can bring you to know yourself in a way that will leave you truly open to another person. When we reach true acceptance of another person, it usually means we have come to know and accept ourselves.

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