Successful Relationships Reading Corner
This week, we wrote about why communicating strengthens the connection in your relationships. This may seem obvious, but it’s a really important point to think about. Here are some other posts we’ve written about this.
How Communicating From Your True Self Deepens Your Relationships “Although we often covered many topics, he wasn’t interested in long conversations filled with chitchat. He wanted to converse on our connection, who each of us was, and what was important to each of us. Don’t misunderstand; we laughed a lot, hiked, went out on the usual dates, and walked around our beautiful city. These all happened, and were crucial to our relationship building. Yet, what made the difference was finding out what was important to each of us, and that came through the emphasis within our communication on sharing ourselves with each other. We soon discovered that communicating on this level was a core value to both of us, and developing this style of connection was central to our movement toward one another. We were each strongly attracted to this way of being together. We bonded early over what was of meaning and value to each of us, and we built our relationship upon that foundation. This understanding was not always spoken. It was also shared through behavior and actions.”
Why Peaceful Relationships Start With This One Radical Choice “This kind of being together doesn’t work when one person is self-absorbed or withdrawn within themselves. Open communication is a prerequisite. You have to be able to bring a certain level of interest in another being: one that involves inner work and a developed consciousness that creates in you a fearless state of being present. You are able to be quietly there with your whole self, offering that presence to the other person. For those who choose to walk this path of peace, this core value will reside in both of you, even if it is not fully developed yet. The dance of learning how to live that within your relationship is a beautiful one; full of surprises, calm, gentleness, openness, and trust. It is freeing and precious.”
Communication and Individuality in a Relationship ” One such topic was respect, and another is regular contact and communication. When the relationship is filled with honoring and accepting each other, a special kind of trust and security is present. For this to exist, each partner must be willing to share their thoughts and feelings. It is important to stay in regular contact and for that contact to be intimate and totally open. When partners know their partner’s thoughts and feelings, they don’t have to make them up from their fears or insecurities. In our experiences with couples, we have found over and over that when this regular contact does not occur, the couple slowly becomes estranged, and the projections and misinterpretations that occur just deepen the rift that grows between them.”