Successful Relationships Reading Corner
This week, we wrote about how to train for better relationships. Here are some posts on how to add fun and adventure to those relationships.
How to Turn Your Relationship Into a Creative Adventure “What I have noticed is that our creativity and playfulness have surged to the forefront with this game. And that has me thinking about creativity and its role in bringing peace to relationships. I think it will help to understand what I am referring to here if I repeat that peace is an actual experience, filled with joy. It is a sensation, as well as a state of being, that reverberates throughout your whole body. It creates a calm, centered, safe place that surrounds the individual and relationships. When we approach things creatively in our connections, it requires being present and open to that which is new and different. We create interactions which are full of an awareness of each other and the play of uniqueness between us. The spontaneity of the plan and the playful aspect of creating a shared adventure cause the kind of inner happiness so characteristic of peace. This is not the peace of the sleeping, or dead (as so many imagine peace), but rather a living, dancing, jump-for-joy reality.”
The Pleasures and Importance of Shared Experience in Your Relationships “This generally happens in two ways. The first is that we do something together, and it creates shared moments. We embark on an activity with each other, and it exists between us and continues in our common memory of our connection. Taking time to be with each other and break out of the usual pattern of relating refreshes and enlivens any relationship. We love being in nature, and the city we live in affords that on every street, with grand old trees everywhere, parks and ponds, woods and creeks, and a profusion of birds. Recently, we went over our local mountains to another town, staying overnight in a hotel. We walked around, talking and going out for lunch. We hiked to a nearby waterfall and soaked in the air and the smells. Phil and I always feel rested and peacefully, deliciously connected after a little trip like that. Going off to another location, with no big interaction with devices, and no scheduled events, brings a different kind of shared experience than our daily life offers.”
Are You Emotionally Present in Your Relationships or Just Not There? “For me, it was the part about being present with, and for, the other person; of being in the present with them and the connection itself. There are many factors that go into being together with someone in this way. When I am with someone who brings this kind of awareness and attention to the interaction, it has a profound effect on me. I want to share myself with them, and I open up more as a result of the interest and caring being shown to me. This is one of those feedback loops in which this way of behaving generates a more open, unguarded communication from each of the parties involved. When someone is interested and taking the time to pay attention to me, and at the same time shares themselves with me on a deeper level, it creates the same response in me.”