Phil, Maude and ChatGPT Talk About Peace in Relationships

Phil, Maude and ChatGPT Talk About Peace in Relationships

ChatGPT is a recent software project that is fed huge swaths of writing and (to simplify tremendously) responds based on what it has read. We asked it to “Write a blog on peace in the style of Phil and Maude” and also did the same ourselves.

MAUDE: Peace is a word that brings many images to many people. But peace is neither an image nor a concept. It is a living reality, a real experience, a state of being and one that is available to each of you if you so desire. You can have inner peace regardless of your situation, and you can have peaceful relationships if you make that your priority.

Early on, Phil and I were so struck by the peaceful nature of our relationship that we began to examine what the components of having this kind of relationship were all about. We found that although a measure of grace was certainly involved, that there were many behaviors and patterns we had developed for living in peace together. I always feel it is necessary to add that we also have a very vital, passionate way of being with each other. I think wanting to point this out comes from the understanding that many people think peace is an absence of passion, that it is a neutral place of no feelings.

Nothing could be further from the truth. Peace is not a mental construct but rather an emotion, a feeling; one which pervades your very sense of what is real down to your inner core. It is exciting, vivifying, and brings everything into focus in vibrant color! Peace brings with it a sense of calm, of clarity, of love and a sense of the reality of goodness.

Our books, courses and this very blog are all founded on the intent to spread peace one relationship at a time.

We feel strongly that learning to change your forms of relating and practicing peace within your relationships is the key to manifesting peace in the world. When you reside in a place of inner peace, you do not ingest the conflict brought to you by others. You can lovingly observe a lack of peace without being drawn into that sense, and you can fruitfully interact so as to change that dynamic. You can learn to find mutually satisfying solutions or be at peace with what is.

It starts within you and spreads to each of your intimate relationships. The power of peace is such that it is infectious and spreads easily. The aroma of peacefulness is recognizable and will strike a chord in the heart of those around you that will grow of its own accord. Make your choice today and join us in learning to live in peace with each other.Look at what is keeping you from being peaceful, then find peace within yourself #peace #quote Click To Tweet

PHIL: The first thing to say about peace is that it is not just a concept, but an actual visceral experience. It is the lack of need, of dissatisfaction, of desire for change. That applies to my relationship with Maude, and the hard question is how that happens. How much is it me and how much is it her? Much of it is Maude: her positivity; her consistency; her politics; her tolerance; the way she does not take offense. But I’ll take credit, too, because it’s a choice, or rather a series of choices. To look at irritation, to realize it arises within me and to laugh at it or ignore it, knowing its transient nature. To relish the feeling of peace and to take action when I notice that lessening. That action, as far as I can tell, is to make a choice of how I want to be.

I also reluctantly recognize that not everybody wants to be peaceful. There are drama queens, football hooligans and street gangs. Is this what was learned in childhood or a part of human nature? Do some people need adrenaline to feel alive, and fighting or skydiving is how to get it? I think human nature is so mutable that much of our conflict is unnecessary. It stems from a sense of shortage, but relationships are not about material things, which is where shortages occur. They fulfill our emotional needs, and there is no limit on love and connection, so peace comes from realizing that our needs are taken care of, that what we want is out there, and it is only our inner wounds that stop us from being open to it.

So stop and look at what is keeping you from being peaceful. There is a wonderful Polish expression, “Not my circus, not my monkeys.” Find peace within yourself, and don’t let other peoples’ dissatisfactions harsh your groove.

ChatGPT: Phil and Maude are known for their unique style of writing about peace and relationships. Their approach is grounded in the belief that peace is not just the absence of conflict, but a deep sense of harmony and connection between individuals. In this blog, I will try to emulate their style and explore what peace means to me.

Peace is a state of being that transcends our everyday experience. It is a feeling of contentment and fulfillment that comes from within, and it is not dependent on external circumstances. When we are at peace, we feel a sense of calmness and serenity, and our minds are free from worries and anxieties. We are able to connect with our inner selves and with the world around us in a more profound way.

At the heart of peace lies the understanding that we are all interconnected, and that our actions have an impact on others. To cultivate peace, we must first cultivate compassion and empathy towards ourselves and others. We must learn to listen deeply to others, to understand their perspectives and to find common ground. We must be willing to let go of our egos and our need to be right, and to focus instead on building meaningful relationships based on mutual respect and understanding.

Peace is not a destination that we can reach by following a specific path. It is an ongoing process of growth and transformation that requires our constant attention and effort. It is a journey that we undertake together, as individuals and as a society. To create a peaceful world, we must work together to address the root causes of conflict and violence, including poverty, inequality, and injustice. We must embrace diversity and celebrate our differences, recognizing that our uniqueness is what makes us strong and resilient.

In conclusion, peace is not a lofty ideal that is beyond our reach. It is a tangible reality that we can create through our thoughts, words, and actions. It is a choice that we make every day, in every interaction we have with others. By choosing peace, we can transform ourselves and the world around us, creating a more harmonious and compassionate society for all.

Photo credit: Maude Mayes
Photo note: Bee here now in Carpinteria Dunes
Photo credit: Phil Mayes
Photo note: Communication lines, circa 1970

Read what some other writers have to say on this topic.

Get our free weekly newsletter about how to have a harmonious relationship.

* indicates required

Tell your friends!

10 Comments on “Phil, Maude and ChatGPT Talk About Peace in Relationships

  1. Wow! What a great blog this morning. As i read it I felt empowered and enthusiastic. I so enjoyed each phrase that speaks to how each of us can bring our part by simply experiencing a deep sense of calm.
    Yes! I found this very exciting as I picture different interactions that I can vitally bring my sense of peace and carry through to each encounter adding more by being present and calm. And thank you for”ChatGPT” which I found fascinating and very explicit. I really loved this piece on peace..what a lift! Thank you!

  2. Given that AI is under such discussion and some peoples’ concerns, I was happy to see you both tackle and show how AI responded. I thought the program did a pretty good job, though missed a bit of your personal touches. I guess if you wanted to go on vacation away from internet, it would do in a pinch. Thank you both for your ongoing efforts and for sharing your unique differences with such appreciation. Love Barb

    • Thank you so much for your feedback, Barbara. We thought it would be an interesting experiment. We wrote ours after ChatGBT, but didn’t look at its till after we wrote ours. I agree with what you said. We would not use it as a substitute for our own writing, however, and if in a big pinch where we truly can’t write two in advance when we are away, we rework one of our many older ones of over a decade every week 🙂 with love

  3. My tea bag this morning said that Peace is built upon trust, which goes along with your blog today.

  4. We live in the foothills – a very rural 90 acres. When I go out in the morning it is the sky, trees, hills, and flowers that I see, and the sounds of birds and animals that I hear. We have no neighbors for some distance. I have frequently described the feeling I have at those times as a feeling of ‘space’, or sometimes, of ‘peace’. I am referring to the physical environment that I absolutely love. Your comments about peace in a relationship have caused me to realize that I could describe the feeling I have with my wife as also one of space or peace. I am not crowded there either. I had not thought of that as peace, but it fits beautifully. Thank you for the prompt.

    • It sounds like a lovely environment. I lived in the country in my 30s and missed London terribly, but I think now I could be there very happily.

  5. Hi Phil and Maude,
    I really Really enjoyed your blog today — so fun to meet my sworn enemy in a message about peace — hahaha.

  6. I’m interested in how ChatGPT compares to human-writing. Many of my freelance colleagues, as well as fully employed writers, are losing jobs because companies are using Artificial Intelligence programming such as ChatGPT instead of paying human writers. AI’s potential with regard to mistakes it might make in medical writing and scientific papers is huge. This interpretation of the Mayes’ blog is frustrating. The AI version includes the word “must” five times within 307 words, and it’s always paired with “we” as in, “we must.” Maude’s section is 415 words, without one “must” and no “we must.” Phil’s section is 317 words without one “we must.” Their combined word count is 732, without any “musts.” In their blogs, books and presentations, the Mayes’ almost never say “we must.” They make “strong suggestions” but much of their approach to their topic is “this is what I do” or “this is what we do.” The AI version sounds like a zealot giving orders, which does not seem to be at all reflective of the Mayes’ approach to their work. This of course makes us wonder, who is programming all these ‘musts’ into ChatGPT? Why is ChatGPT being programmed with all these (Orwellian?) musts?

    • That’s a really interesting analysis of ChatGPT; I hadn’t noticed it. Thomas Friedman wrote a NYT OpEd “We Are Opening the Lids on Two Giant Pandora’s Boxes” worrying about AI. And don’t fall for the calls to control it; AI is out of the box. Facbook’s Large Language Model (LLM) leaked online in March and has been rapidly adopted by the Open Source community.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *