Successful Relationships Reading Corner
This week, we wrote about why you need a balance of being and doing in your relationships. Although we haven’t found any articles looking at this issue the way we did, they do discuss ways you can practice this.
Doing vs Being: The Importance of “Being” in a World Dominated by “Doing” “When we go about our lives, we are all constantly in one of two modes: “doing” or “being”. Doing mode is when we are living in our heads, thinking about the present, the future, and the past, making plans, and completing tasks. Being mode is when we are living in the moment, experiencing things directly. Both forms of mental state are necessary at different times; however, modern cultural values dictate that doing is more important that being. Therefore, most of us spend too much time in doing mode and very little time appreciating our core experiences in the present moment.”
Being vs. Doing: The Peculiar Art of Getting Unstuck “Modern technology encourages us to do rather than to be. Even when queuing up at the supermarket, we answer emails. And while waiting for a taxi, we check Twitter or mindlessly scroll through Instagram. When did you last pause? And what did you notice when you paused? Isn’t that weird? Doing gives us a sense of control.”
On presence: cultivating the art of being rather than doing “How often do you find while carrying out a task you’re mentally compiling a list of all the other things you still need to do before the end of the day? How often do you find while talking to someone, you’re having an entirely different conversation in your head (possibly returning to that task list)? How often do you go over conversations you’ve already had, analysing on repeat what was meant by a particular comment or expression?”