Successful Relationships Reading Corner
This week, we wrote about how to use relationship disagreements in a positive way. It is hard to find matching articles because most of them are about how conflict is good. Here are three articles that understand why it is not necessary.
Disagreements Are Not Conflicts “While lots of couples, and the people who advise them, use disagreement and conflict interchangeably; I believe doing so ignores important differences between these two types of interactions. The defining thing about a disagreement is that you and your partner are talking to each other. And because you are talking to each other, you can negotiate a resolution to the disagreement. You can look for a win-win outcome. Most importantly, after the disagreement, you are both still talking to each other. In contrast, when you and your spouse are in conflict, you are making assumptions about each other and the feelings you have toward each other are negative and strong.”
7 Ways Happy Couples Deal with Disagreements Differently “Every couple disagrees from time to time. Perfect compatibility is not possible, but sensibly working though incompatibility is. The difference between a happy couple and an unhappy couple is the way in which they handle their disagreements. Thus, in order to grow and be successful in our intimate relationships, we must adopt healthy coping strategies for dealing with our differences.”
7 Simple Ways to Deal With a Disagreement Effectively “In every relationship, personal or professional, there will always be some disagreement. You will never find an environment where people always agree and that understand each other. That’s fantasy, not reality. As a leadership coach I spend a lot of time working with my clients helping them deal with breakdowns in communication–and truly, a lot of disagreements amount to a breakdown in communication. Here are seven very simple but effective ways I’ve learned over the years for dealing productively with disagreement.”