Successful Relationships Reading Corner
This week, we wrote about how to recognize that each relationship is a unique treasure. Here are some articles that describe describe the current thinking in this area.
“We-Talk” Is Linked to Happier and Healthier Relationships “‘I-talk’ refers to the frequent use of first-person singular pronouns, such as ‘I,’ ‘me,’ and “mine,” when writing or speaking. “We-talk” refers to the frequent use of first-person plural pronouns, such as ‘we,’ ‘us,’ and ‘ours.’ Earlier this year, a study from the University of Arizona reported that excessive ‘I-talk’ was an accurate linguistic marker for the likelihood that someone was more prone to general distress and a wide array of negative emotions. (For more, see: ‘Stressed Out? Too Much ‘I-Talk’ Could Be Part of the Problem.’)”
Why autonomy in a relationship is important (+ ways to nurture it) “Humans are social creatures who yearn for belonging and support. But you also must prioritize your own needs and goals to feel like you’re bringing your most authentic self to each relationship. Creating the right balance between reliance and autonomy is tricky and often starts with your relationship with yourself. But fostering autonomy in your relationships might just be the key to enjoying healthy connections.”
The “We” of Healthy Relationships “When couples make a commitment to each other, there is often a transition in how the individuals speak. Instead of ‘I’ did this or that, it becomes ‘we’ did this or that. Or ‘we’ think thus and so. This is not a mere grammatical change. It reflects a profound shift in the self of each member of the couple. That is, the partner becomes a part of the self. This is described in self-expansion theory or the inclusion of other in the self (IOS).”