Successful Relationships Reading Corner
In this week’s blog we stated that no matter what you think, not all couples fight! It’s a radical view, but here are a few relationship experts who agree.
How Not to Fight “In my counseling practice, couples are often surprised to learn they can communicate and solve problems effectively without fighting; but sometimes you may find it’s not so easy to give up your struggles. You may have trouble letting go of the fighting habit because of two factors: social expectations (expectations the people around you have about marriage) and myths (common beliefs not based on fact.)There are many myths and expectations about fighting in marriage. Couples come into my office frequently believing that fighting is a necessary part of being a couple; that all married couples fight; and it’s a normal part of marriage. But the fact is that fighting accomplishes nothing, and it isn’t necessary for couples to argue, to yell, or to have heated discussions to get problems solved. Hanging on to these ideas makes it difficult to let go of fighting.”
The 7 Best Tips for Handling Anger and Resentment in Relationships “Empathy, it turns out, is the antidote to anger in relationships. As such, feelings of empathy also fuel natural anxiety reduction. Not only will you hopefully come to an understanding with your life partner, you will both feel calmer. Empathy, it turns out, is the antidote to anger in relationships. As such, feelings of empathy also fuel natural anxiety reduction. Not only will you hopefully come to an understanding with your life partner, you will both feel calmer. Making empathy a regular part of your relationship will have an impact not only on getting along better, but ultimately feeling more connected and less stressed, because it facilitates you getting out of your own head, and into your partner’s.”
We Can’t Talk Without Arguing: How to Stop Fighting All the Time “When people get defensive, anger grows even more intense. This makes it hard for you and your partner to work together. You want to join forces to solve a problem. Instead you’re fighting in a way that seems unavoidable and beyond anyone’s control.”