Speaking directly doesn’t happen naturally because we all create a persona for the outside world. It’s easy to take that feeling into a relationship, but here’s why that is a bad idea: it’s a limitation on feeling our full self; we cannot sit comfortably at the center of our being.
One of the steps to a peaceful relationship is honesty. When you share honestly with another, you set aside fears and defenses. You can share a bit and when you are accepted and respected, when you feel seen and heard, you dare to open a bit more.
Why aren’t people totally honest with each other? Maybe they think it will cause strife in the relationship. But strife isn’t the only reason for not being honest; shame is, too. There is something you are uncomfortable sharing, but you need to regard honesty as more important than shame.
What are the threads of a peaceful relationship? They lie in the steadfastness of that connection. In every peaceful relationship, whether a friendship, relation, or a romantic one, there has to be both a feeling that the connection is solid and a lack of any need to question that.
Total honesty is a major part of a harmonious relationship. Holding back in the sense of not presenting yourself totally means that you are not quite yourself when you’re with the other person.
In society, we hide our true selves. We put on our public face; we don’t say how rude that was or where to shove that job. Maybe these social graces are necessary for society to work, or maybe they are just the social norm, but we mostly follow them so we fit in. We were taught this from childhood on, and now it’s second nature. But in a relationship, this doesn’t serve you well. To the extent that you keep a part of yourself private, you reduce trust and intimacy.
Speak your truth. It may not be good advice at work or in a crowded bar, but with personal relationships, it is the path to a deeper connection and a soul-satisfying peace. Yet, what is speaking one’s truth and how …
Why It’s Important to Know Your Truth and Share it in Your Relationships Read more »
PHIL: In society, we hide our true selves. We put on our public face; we don’t say how rude that was or where to shove that job. Maybe these social graces are necessary for society to work, or maybe they …
Why it is Important to be Honest and Share Your Truth in Relationships Read more »
PHIL: You’ve heard over and over how bad lying is in your relationship, but telling the truth can be hard. Society operates with social graces, inhibitions and taboos. Two big ones are money and sex: try asking a stranger what …
Why You Need to Trust and Speak Your Truth in Relationships Read more »
MAUDE: Phil and I were sharing over dinner the other night and found ourselves discussing what it means to speak your truth, and how you find your way to that truth. I was telling him about some challenges I was …
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