Reading Corner

Links related to the weekly posts.

 

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In this week’s blog, we wrote about sex and union in a relationship, one of three aspects of mutuality. Here are articles about both the scientific and union aspects.

4 Scientific Ways Good Sex Brings You Closer to Your Partner “Does engaging in intercourse make you feel closer to your partner? You’re not alone. There are scientific reasons why sex (especially good sex) makes you feel closer to your lover.”

Spiritual Sex: Ecstatic Love Beyond The Physical “The fact is that sexuality and spirituality were never split until well into the first millennium of the Common Era when denial of the body became the popular theology of the day. It may seem outrageous to view sexuality in such lofty terms. Yet, it no longer makes sense to deny the spiritual dimension of our sexuality, as if we had “lower,” physical urges and “higher,” spiritual functions, disconnected from the body.”

10 Benefits of Physical Intimacy in Your Relationship “Physical intimacy involves a deep emotional connection that is strengthened when you are in close sensual proximity to your spouse. Touching, both romantically and otherwise, can help strengthen this bond. How important is physical intimacy in a relationship? Having this deep bond can have a positive effect on nearly every other aspect of your relationship.”

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In this week’s blog, we said that mutuality is the core of a peaceful relationship. Here are some articles that talk about this from differing points of view.

The Principle of Mutuality in Relationships “There is a universal rule or principle that, if properly practiced and adhered to in every layer of societies, will bring about peace, prosperity and justice for all. This principle is called the principle of mutuality. Elsewhere in the scriptures, it is also known as the Golden Rule or “do unto others as you would want others to do unto you”.”

The Meaning of Mutuality (pdf) “Delineation of different kinds of relationships becomes important as a way of understanding what people are seeking in relationships and why certain relationships are a source of joy and meaning, while others become deadening and destructive. People often speak of the search for mutuality in relationship as a goal in their lives, particularly in dyadic love relationships.”

True Mutuality: ?The Key to Creating Healthy Relationships “Ultimately, this is all about boundaries. And healthy relationships come when we draw and maintain those healthy boundaries. In positive relationships, we carry mutuality within us. We balance care for another person’s goals while still caring about our own goals. We balance respect for others while respecting ourselves.”

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In this week’s blog, we talked about why it’s important to share your true feelings in your relationship. We found some articles with very astute insights into this subject.

How to Talk About Feelings With Your Romantic Partner “Here’s the thing: Naming feelings is not the final step to solving difficulties. Sometimes it takes time and work to make changes that help both partners feel comfortable. But an important first step in many situations is finding the words that describe the actual feelings. And sometimes that’s actually enough to start a change process.”

5 Easy Ways To Communicate Better in Your Relationship “Communication is defined as a lot of things but my favorite definition includes, “the successful conveying or sharing of ideas and feelings”. I always say I’m a great talker, but I have to also be an equally great listener in order to be a great communicator. Communication is about expressing yourself in a healthy way, listening to your partner when they are doing the same, and really hearing and absorbing what the other person has to say.”

Why Couples Should Be Talking About Their Feelings “Some people really struggle to bring up the topics that impact their relationship. This is because it taps into our worst fears about being rejected, abandoned or some other dreadful action by our partner. But, like the everyday life topics, it’s not enough to just talk about your thoughts and opinions on the tougher issues (parenting, sex, in-laws, finances and so on). You must also discuss (you guessed it!) how you feel about these topics”

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In this week’s blog, we wrote about how to stay balanced in your life and relationships. These articles provide helpful suggestions and interesting research on the benefits of mindfulness.

7 Strategies to Face Life’s Challenges “In our personal lives, and on a global scale, we face challenges that test our emotional mettle — injury, illness, unemployment, grief, divorce, death, or even a new venture with an unknown future. Here are seven strategies to help carry us through.”

The Science and Practice of Staying Present Through Difficult Times “Research into mindfulness has shown the benefits of staying present, and of gently turning towards difficulty. Mindfulness-based relapse prevention (MBRP) trains people with addictive habits to manage their cravings mindfully by staying present to the sensations of craving, rather than trying to distract from them, avoid them or defeat them.”

How to Face a Challenge With Confidence “Do not underestimate the power of being present. If you make a practice of facing your challenges—even in failure—with full presence and awareness, you will find most challenges are not challenges at all. Instead life’s challenges become messages from the universe. Meditation can help you cultivate silent awareness and is a good tool to help bring that focus to yourself during difficult times.”

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Our guest blogger wrote this week about starting life in a bad place, finding herself through bodywork, and finally realizing the need to move on from the past. These posts discuss that intimate mind-body connection and how to process your pain.

Connecting Emotions to a Felt Body Sense “The idea that the mind and body are inextricably intertwined is widely accepted in our field, but many therapists remain so focused on understanding the thoughts and feelings in clients’ minds that they forget about the pivotal information to be gleaned by paying more attention to clients’ bodies.”

How to Release Emotions Stuck in Your Body and Let Go of the Pain “We are emotional creatures, and we were born to express emotions freely and openly. Somewhere along the way, however, many of us learned to repress emotions, especially those deemed ‘negative,’ in order to fit in, earn love, and be accepted. This was my experience. I grew up in a home where the motto was ‘Children are to be seen, not heard.’ There was little emotional expression allowed, let alone accepted. No one was there to validate or help us process emotions in a healthy way. Anger was met with anger, fear went unacknowledged, and there was plenty of shame to go around.”

Why Releasing Pain From Your Heart Gives You The Freedom To Be Yourself “…you cannot hold on to feelings of sadness and disappointment because doing so means to inhibit life flowing through you. It is akin to building a dam from piles of rocks in a flowing river. Eventually, the force of the water will erode the rocks or find its way through it. Author Davidji writes in Sacred Powers: The Five Secrets to Awakening Transformation: ‘What has happened in the past can’t be changed. We can’t unring the bell, but we can move forward….and how you choose to move forward from this moment, is the choice that will determine the fabric of your life.'”

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