Reading Corner

This week’s blog is on maintaining flexibility within your relationship. Here are some articles discussing this topic.

Improving Couples’ Attachment Security, Intimacy, Stability and Satisfaction “I believe the primary objective in couple therapy is to help couples improve the stability and satisfaction in their relationship and learn to stay flexible, not rigid. It’s important for couples to maintain a context of intimacy and engagement that allows them to experience a sense of trust and security in which they can be ‘safely vulnerable.'”

How to be Flexible in a Relationship “A lot of us have been conditioned to think that once we find the person who we believe is perfect for us, then the hard work is over. Everything should be smooth sailing from that point on. After all, if they are perfect for us, shouldn’t everything just fall into place? But that couldn’t be further from the truth. In fact, once you find the partner you are ready to commit to, that’s when the real work begins. And any healthy relationship will require a certain amount of flexibility from each partner.”

Relationship Tips for a Happy Marriage Part 92: Be Flexible “Would you describe yourself as a flexible person? Flexibility in marriage means being open to each other’s plans and ideas, and being willing to go beyond the comfort zone where necessary. It also means getting over the idea that your desires are the most important consideration in the relationship and responding to the needs and desires of the other party.”

This week’s blog is on belief and intention within relationships. Here are some articles of interest on this topic.

3 Questions To Ask Yourself Before You Enter A Relationship “Recently, I did something radical; I entered into a relationship with the intention of extending love. I consciously set the goal of peace.”

How to Attract Peaceful & Nurturing Relationships “I used to think relationships had to always be hard. Full of strife, jealousy and distrust. Subject to harsh words, crossing the line, anger and resentment. And I found myself in relationship after relationship, whether friendship or romantic, that only confirmed this…. Eventually, I just couldn’t take it anymore… I wanted peace. I wanted understanding. I wanted my relationships to feel calm, nurturing and, most of all, respectful.”

Why Are Intention and Belief Important in Relationships? This is an earlier post by us (Phil and Maude) on the same subject. “You have to believe that a peaceful non-conflictual relationship is possible before you are likely to experience it…. Once you have the belief that such a form of relating is possible, you have to make it your intention to have this in your relationship.”

This week’s blog is on the power of touch. Here are some articles to this very important topic:

The Power of Touch “Touch is the first sense we acquire and the secret weapon in many a successful relationship. Here’s how to regain fluency in your first language.”

Intimacy In Relationships “One of the keys to a healthy, long-term relationship is maintaining physical intimacy. I’m not just talking about sex, though—for many reasons, non-sexual physical intimacy is just as important. For one thing, touch is a form of communication. It can reveal everything from your partner’s current mood state to their stress level.”

The Power of Touch in Your Relationship “research reported in the New York Times suggests that couples that engage in more touch report higher levels of relationship satisfaction. This might sound like common sense, but it is also a good reminder of what helps sustain successful relationships.”

This week’s blog is a review of together.guide and the article we wrote for them on “Our Conflict-Free Relationship.” It’s hard to find articles that espouse our position directly, but these cover the important issue of communication in relationships.

Communication Between Couples: How to Communicate in a Relationship “Most people have never learned how to communicate. Without this skill, a person is handicapped in an intimate relationship. Without being able to express themselves and listen to another, partners cannot achieve intimacy. By developing your communication skills, you and your partner will be able to establish and preserve a loving, respectful relationship between two people who love each other.”

The Seven Deadly Sins of a Relationship “A reader, newly married, asked me to share my tips on how to make a marriage work. I wish I had a magic formula, but here’s a simple list of tips: spend time alone together; appreciate each other; be intimate often; talk and share and give.”

How to Communicate with Your Partner without Starting a Fight “A frequent concern couples have is how to express their disagreements without starting a fight. Learning how to communicate with your partner in a way that minimizes your partner’s defensiveness and makes it possible to have a conversation and not an argument is vital to the success of any relationship. Having a conversation and having an argument are two very different things…”

This week’s blog is on peace in your relationship and the world. Here are some articles on peaceful relationships.

The Secret to Peaceful Relationships “There was a time when it was very easy for me to be disappointed by other people. I can’t tell you how many times I would feel angry or let down when someone failed to do what I wanted them to do or what they agreed they would do. I would sometimes be filled with strong, uncomfortable feelings in these situations.”

10 Ways to Have Peaceful, Loving Relationships “If you’ve ever gotten in a fight only to find yourself wondering what you were really upset about, this post may help you. If you’ve ever been disappointed because someone didn’t meet your expectations, this post may help you, too. Feel walked on and unheard? You guessed it—there’s likely something in here that will help you change that.”

5 Rules for Relationship Peace “the tension that actually led to the fight itself almost always related to the deeper issues of whether the partners felt understood or valued…. So it is the nature and degree of interaction between the partners that determines how they get along. Too little interaction, or too imposing interaction, and things heat up. Both of these relationship mistakes have one thing in common. They lack mindfulness and presence.”