Santa Barbara has moved into the Yellow Zone. We’re fully vaccinated and in the midst of a lovely and hectic flurry of meeting up with people as we all emerge from the pandemic. It has been wonderful seeing people we …
Can We Make All Our Relationships New and Fresh As We Emerge From Lockdown? Read more »
PHIL: Language is an ax that divides the world. Take any word – tree, timidity, travel – and we can say what it does and doesn’t apply to. There will be fuzziness at the edges, but the effect is to …
You Need to Honor the Connection at the Heart of all Relationships Read more »
PHIL: Everybody we know seems to be venturing out again. We’re on our second trip since being fully vaccinated, and on the drive we talked about the importance of getaways and why this is so. One reason is the stimulation …
Why Making Time for Sacred Space in Your Relationship is so Important Read more »
We live a peaceful, harmonious life together. What makes this possible? Because that is our desire and our intention. We often caution you to remember that you and your partner (the same applies to all intimate relationships) are both on …
Why It Is Important To Remember You Are On The Same Side As Your Partner Read more »
Maude was describing our relationship as having an element of peace, a lack of anxiety; of there never being any distance between us; that we could trust that no weird thing would suddenly appear between us, that no Jeckyll and …
Make Your Relationship Commitment About Intention, Not Obligation Read more »
We wrote last week about why core values are so important and that when you and your partner want different things, having shared core values usually makes a resolution possible. Sometimes, of course, it’s not a problem at all. Bill …
How to Work Through Disagreements to Reach a Mutual Solution Read more »
What do you do when disagreements arise in a relationship? There will be times when it appears you and your partner are at odds. We get along great, but I don’t do well with the step-kids. I am passionate about …
How Important Are Your Wants And Needs Compared To Your Core Values? Read more »
People get into quarrels over all sorts of things, big and small. They get upset because they feel they’re not going to get what they want; anything from a clean kitchen to another child. They might feel hurt, attacked, insulted, …
It Is Important To See The Other’s Viewpoint In Your Relationship Read more »
Recently, Phil had an experience in a group that he runs that showed us how critical it is to know what our most basic feelings are. An event happened in the group that was presented in a strongly emotional way, …
How Coming From Love Rather Than Fear Changes Your Relationships Read more »
PHIL: Maude and I have been together for 16 years; my half-dozen previous relationships lasted no more than three. I described this to Maude on our second date, and she thought to herself that was because I hadn’t met her. …
Do You Want a Peaceful Relationship? Yes, You Can Have One! Read more »