Reading Corner

Links related to the weekly posts.

 

By Posted on Posted in Reading, Relationship differences, Relationships, Spectrum of Acceptance No Comments

In this week’s blog, we wrote about how to look at differences in your relationship. These articles cover various aspects of that.

Deep Acceptance In Relationships “For securely attached adults, differences between them are generally not threatening to the relationship. … For insecurely attached adults (on average one out of three, though people tend to hang out with like-kinds) it’s a whole different ballgame, and this is where things get way more complicated.”

Acceptance: The Foundation of Lasting Relationships “Research suggests that there are fundamentally five ways to deal with disappointment and disillusionment in a romantic partner, each with varying degrees of effectiveness:”

6 Ways to Manage the Differences in Your Relationship “Mary loves romantic comedies. Her boyfriend Sam likes action movies—the more violent, the better. She’s a vegetarian; he’s a carnivore. ‘I love him, but we seem totally mismatched,’ she says. ‘We can’t agree on a movie or a meal; how can we make important life choices, like where we’ll live or when we’ll start a family?’”

By Posted on Posted in Core Values, Presence, Reading, Relationships No Comments

In this week’s blog, we asked why are core values important in your relationship? Here are some articles that deal with core values, including an exercise to help determine them.

The key for a successful relationship: Aligned values “Aligned values are one the most important things in any relationship. Whether it is with your life partner or business partner, aligned or misaligned values will define the success or failure of a relationship from day one. I like to visualise this as a pyramid, where at the very top you have your values, and below that, you have your life vision, then your objectives, and then at the bottom, your interests.”

What Core Values Mean to Love “Core values form the foundation on which we live and conduct ourselves. When we’re in alignment with our core values, we know the direction our life is heading and what’s important to us. We experience more peace, self confidence and well-being. Without core values, we find ourselves drifting from relationship to relationship or staying in unhealthy relationships and never really feeling fulfilled.”

Live Your Core Values: 10 Minute Exercise to Increase Your Success “Our core values are the true representation of our authentic selves. Unfortunately, our authenticity is not always what we present to the world. The bright beacon of core values may dim under clouds other people and circumstances cast over them. That is why it is important to know and stand firm on what your core values are. … It doesn’t take years of soul searching and self-reflection to find your core values. The following exercise can help you start living your best life according to your core values in 30 minutes or less.”

By Posted on Posted in Presence, Reading, Relationships No Comments Tagged with

In this week’s blog we asked if you are open to the sacred in your relationship. Here are some writings that others have done.

What is Sacred Union with Another Person? “A sacred relationship is a relationship in which we are inspired to see the Divine in another person. We become ready for this sacred relationship at a very particular time in our lives – a time when we awaken to the sacredness within ourselves. When you come to realize that you’re not just a body – that you are, in fact, the essence of love and truth – a deep desire to know yourself as love (and to experience this sacred love in relationships), comes forth.”

Sacred Relationship Takes Courage “The key to sacred relationship is to have the spiritual perception of who you are and who the other is. This essential spiritual understanding is the foundation of sacred relationship. Sacred relationship is the oldest and the newest frontier. In today’s society, the whole meaning of relationship as sacred – as an evolutionary way of life – is not exactly a focus. But it’s the newest frontier and represents the cutting edge of consciousness.”

SACRED RELATIONSHIPS: A New Paradigm Unfolding “I’ve come to realize that there aren’t many examples of sacred relationships on the planet – relationships where both partners genuinely love themselves and each other; relationships where both partners enjoy themselves, each other, and life together. Sacred relationships do exist, but they are so uncommon that the majority of us have yet to witness a true sacred relationship, let alone experience one. What is a sacred relationship? Why are we so challenged with finding our ‘soul mate’, our ‘twin flame’, or our ‘true love’? Perhaps the answer lies in our perception of what true love is and what it means to be in a sacred relationship.”

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In this week’s blog we asked if you need to be mature for a conflict free relationship. Here are some other peoples’ writing on the subject.

How to Have a Mature Relationship Although WikiHow has a cartoon look to it, we find that the advice is often spot on. “Mature adult relationships are founded on good communication and trust. When these factors are in place, both partners feel supported by and committed to the relationship. If you want to help your relationship mature, work on building a healthy bond, developing positive communication habits, and improving trust between you and your partner. It may also help to get insight into your past habits to solve common relationship problems.”

3 Things Emotionally Mature Couples Do “A mature relationship lives by this peace of mind; immature ones drown in it. There’s no real drama. Because drama is for kids. Drama is for people who don’t know how to have a relationship — who live by idealistic, preconceived notions that love must be wild and obsessive. Love is easy. It’s the easiest thing you’ve ever done. It’s the calmest place in your life, the safest blanket you’ve ever worn. It’s something that happens naturally; it doesn’t need to be fought for day in and day out.”

Difference Between A Mature Relationship And An Immature Relationship “Emotional maturity is an essential ingredient in creating a stable, loving, and long-lasting relationship. It does not come naturally with age. Couples who have been married 30 plus years and are still locked in a power struggle have not yet achieved emotional maturity as they are often stuck in the blame game and the cycle of reactivity. Emotionally mature couples have developed healthy habits that have enabled them to take the higher road and have led them to create fulfilling relationships. Here are three things emotionally mature couples do:”

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In this week’s blog we asked why are acceptance, appreciation and acknowledgement important in your relationship? Other people write about these, sometimes choosing slightly different A?words.

The 3As in Relationship Success: Acceptance, Appreciation, Acknowledgement “This is when being able to fully accept your lover is essential. It doesn’t mean you have to agree with everything they say, do, or believe. But you have to know that this is who they are. They are not you and for some people this can be upsetting. I know, hard to believe, but it is amazing how many people come into my office wanting me to change their partner — make them understand how incorrect they are in their beliefs and actions. This is non-acceptance at its highest form.”

Learn the 5 A’s of Relating “We all crave something in relationships. This is why you are reading this blog. This is why you have sought out relationships of every kind for your entire life. We are innately social creatures, constantly seeking something from others, and giving that something back to others in the process we call relating. We’ve seen it in the movies, romance novels, success stories, and the like. We seek it subconsciously every day, but how do you describe it? What is it, exactly? The closest I’ve come to understanding what “it” is came when I learned the 5 A’s of relationships.”

Being accepted and appreciated for who you are “What could be more fundamental to a healthy, loving relationship than being accepted and appreciated for who you are? And yet, it’s a common issue. Why is that? One set of reasons boil down to challenges in communication and interpretation.”

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