Phil had a relationship in his 30’s where his partner just wanted to be heard, but instead, he would offer advice. He was so accustomed to being called on to fix things like a broken door-lock that such conversations seemed …
Our partners and intimates are not mind readers, yet too often we act as though they are. We are taught in society to be polite, not hurt other’s feelings, be careful what we say and how we say it. In …
It’s Important to Share Your True Feelings in Your Relationship Read more →
MAUDE: Last week we wrote about how important it is to check in regularly with each other. On one of our recent check-ins, I shared with Phil that I was becoming deeply distressed about an area of importance to me …
How to Have Challenging Conversations With Your Partner Read more →
Words matter; what we say and how we say it counts. In a recent blog, Phil mentioned the concept of the inner critic from The Artist’s Way, and how we can work with positive affirmations to help reframe what we …
Positive Words Are Powerful for Your Relationship Read more →
We keep cut flowers in the house and carry them up to decorate the bedroom at night. A morning conversation: “We need to bring the flowers down.” “I’ve done it already.” This is a teeny example of how we work …
In a Successful Relationship You Have to Be Cooperative Read more →
PHIL: So, a little back story first. I’ve sporadically been feeling claustrophobic and overwhelmed by the amount of STUFF that has accumulated around the house. Long story short, after I had taken care of digitizing all our CDs and turned …
How to Stop Irritation Poisoning Your Relationship Read more →
There’s more to active listening than usually gets discussed. We bumped up against this recently, while working on a Secret Project. We were talking, and both of us felt interrupted by the other. We’ve occasionally had this experience of being …
Both life and relationships need a balance between planning and going with the flow. This is an important part of our lives and the lives of our relationships. Yet how do we do both at the same time? People differ …
How to Balance Structure and Flow in Your Relationship Read more →
This week, Maude has been away each night taking care of the grandchildren, and she recently took one of them up to the Bay area for a week. None of this put a ripple in our relationship. We have a …
How to Blend Connection and Separation in Your Relationship Read more →
The point of marriage is not to create a quick commonality by tearing down all boundaries; on the contrary, a good marriage is one in which each partner appoints the other to be the guardian of his solitude, and thus …
How to Be Both Together and Separate in Your Relationship Read more →