We live a peaceful, harmonious life together. What makes this possible? Because that is our desire and our intention. We often caution you to remember that you and your partner (the same applies to all intimate relationships) are both on …
Why It Is Important To Remember You Are On The Same Side As Your Partner Read more »
Maude was describing our relationship as having an element of peace, a lack of anxiety; of there never being any distance between us; that we could trust that no weird thing would suddenly appear between us, that no Jeckyll and …
Make Your Relationship Commitment About Intention, Not Obligation Read more »
We wrote last week about why core values are so important and that when you and your partner want different things, having shared core values usually makes a resolution possible. Sometimes, of course, it’s not a problem at all. Bill …
How to Work Through Disagreements to Reach a Mutual Solution Read more »
What do you do when disagreements arise in a relationship? There will be times when it appears you and your partner are at odds. We get along great, but I don’t do well with the step-kids. I am passionate about …
How Important Are Your Wants And Needs Compared To Your Core Values? Read more »
People get into quarrels over all sorts of things, big and small. They get upset because they feel they’re not going to get what they want; anything from a clean kitchen to another child. They might feel hurt, attacked, insulted, …
It Is Important To See The Other’s Viewpoint In Your Relationship Read more »
Recently, Phil had an experience in a group that he runs that showed us how critical it is to know what our most basic feelings are. An event happened in the group that was presented in a strongly emotional way, …
How Coming From Love Rather Than Fear Changes Your Relationships Read more »
PHIL: Maude and I have been together for 16 years; my half-dozen previous relationships lasted no more than three. I described this to Maude on our second date, and she thought to herself that was because I hadn’t met her. …
Do You Want a Peaceful Relationship? Yes, You Can Have One! Read more »
PHIL: We have plenty in common, but also plenty of differences. How we connect socially. What we read. What our diets are. Our differences don’t cause us problems, but for many people, they are a perennial battlefield. Maggie Scarf proposed …
How To See Your Differences As Assets Rather Than Causing Arguments Read more »
We were in a Zoom meeting yesterday with a writing group talking about how we are feeling at this point in the pandemic and what we have been dealing with personally. It was a very open, warm sharing and everyone …
The Increasing Importance of Relationships a Year Into The Pandemic Read more »
Our culture is oriented around the individual. People (including us!) write about how to find yourself. Herbert Hoover famously used the phrase “rugged individualism.” Countless articles advise how to improve ourselves, whether at the gym, the makeup counter, or our …
Why is it Important not to Focus on Yourself in Relationships? Read more »