Whether you are struggling in a partnership, a familial relationship or a close friendship, the challenge remains the same: how do you care for your individual needs and desires and still manifest cooperation? Our answer to this is always the …
How Does Knowing Yourself Help You Find Mutual Solutions In Relationships? Read more »
PHIL: We’re not primarily writing about sex this week, but it’s a useful place to start. What are the odds that you and your sexual partner become aroused at the same time, say 8:00 PM on Friday? If arousal is …
Our Relationship is Harmonious Because We Want it to Be That Way Read more »
Last week we celebrated our wedding anniversary by going up to Scotts Valley and visiting the Redwoods. We stayed in a great AirBnB set apart on a lovely big property in the woods and had a wonderful four days. On …
Why You Benefit From Both Separation and Connection in Your Relationships Read more »
Each of us has a unique view of the world – our own. Our view includes our bodily sensations, our external senses and our life experience, from upbringing to education. Nobody else can understand completely what it is like to …
Why it is Important to Understand Motivations in Our Relationships Read more »
PHIL: Touch a sea anemone in a rock pool and it will close up. With such a long history, it’s not surprising that touch communicates very deep and powerful messages. Of all our senses, it is the only one that …
Why Touch Is Such an Important Factor in All Our Relationships Read more »
PHIL: The threefold crises of the pandemic, democratic collapse and global warming feel unprecedented, yet there were also earlier periods when people felt their world was irretrievably upended. From a diary of the time: “There’s no word I can start …
Why You Need to Remain Flexible in a Time of Great Change Read more »
PHIL: Nearly every night Maude and I retire early, do the New York Times crossword, read out loud, watch Netflix and generally hang out together. We’ve come to call this time our Sacred Space – a time we spend away …
Why You Should Take the Time and Attention to Honor Your Relationships Read more »
PHIL: Do you know that feeling of satisfaction that comes from working with someone on a project? It might be sweeping leaves or planning an event. Perhaps it’s cooking together or being on a sports team. Working with other people …
Remember the Shared Purpose at the Heart of Your Relationship Read more »
PHIL: You’ve heard over and over how bad lying is in your relationship, but telling the truth can be hard. Society operates with social graces, inhibitions and taboos. Two big ones are money and sex: try asking a stranger what …
Why You Need to Trust and Speak Your Truth in Relationships Read more »
Are you having disagreements that turn into arguments in your relationships? Are your different ideas about how to do things causing separation and distance between you and your partner, friend, relative? This can be changed! Disagreements come in different degrees. …
How Mutual Solutions Help You to Solve Disagreements and Avoid Arguments Read more »