Reading Corner
Links related to the weekly posts.
In this week’s blog, we talked about putting peace at the heart of your relationships. There are many different aspects to peace, both personal and social. Here are some examples that range widely across the spectrum.
Relationship Peace “Peace is not a consequence that automatically occurs because two people choose to enter into a human relationship like marriage or friendship. Without consistent effort any preference for peace will probably be overcome by the prevalence of problems. Genuine peace must be pursued with diligence and devotion.”
Peace in Relationship — a video. “Why find peace some day? The ability to access peace has always been with you.”
Societies within peace systems avoid war and build positive intergroup relationships “A comparative anthropological perspective reveals not only that some human societies do not engage in war, but also that peaceful social systems exist…. The mere existence of peace systems is important because it demonstrates that creating peaceful intergroup relationships is possible whether the social units are tribal societies, nations, or actors within a regional system. Peace systems have received scant scientific attention despite holding potentially useful knowledge and principles about how to successfully cooperate to keep the peace.”
In this week’s blog, we wrote about why it is important to speak your truth in relationships. Here are some other authors writing about this topic.
9 Easy Ways You Can Speak Your Truth Today “When your circumstances invite you to present your true self to others, do you accept the invitation? I think of authentic communication as sharing the unfiltered essence of ourselves with others, including our identities, feelings, needs, boundaries, and desires. It’s taken me many years to learn how to communicate this way. I’ve written in prior posts that speaking my truth once felt like an insurmountable challenge, like rolling an elephant up a hill or finding another living being who actually likes Nickelback. (Anyone? No?)”
The Value of Speaking Your Truth “When teaching effective communication, I usually find myself emphasizing the power of listening. It’s amazing how much you can accomplish just by showing another person that you care about their experience. But recently a number of interactions have reminded me about the fact that good communication begins with having the courage to speak up, say what you’re feeling and ask for what you need”
How to Speak Your Truth, Part 1 and Part 2 “Speaking your truth can be one of the most powerful ways to transform your relationship. It opens the door to greater authenticity, intimacy, connection, satisfaction, and security. How, you wonder? Consider: Being honest about who you are is the best way to get to be you who you are. It never feels good to hide or compromise your true self, and it’s a deeply felt human desire to be seen, known, accepted and loved.”
In our blog this week, we wrote about the opportunity for a fresh start as we emerge from the lockdown. Let’s find a way to connect and treasure each other all the time, not just when things go bad! Here are the takes of some other writers on this.
Need a reset? The end of pandemic life can be a fresh start “If there was ever a perfect time to make a life change, this is it. Behavioural scientists have long known that times of disruption and trauma also create new opportunities for growth and change. Disruption happens when life knocks us out of our normal routines. It can be moving to a new city, starting a new job, getting married or divorced, or having a child. And for many of us there’s never been a bigger life disruption than the pandemic, which has changed how we work, eat, sleep and exercise, and even how we connect with friends and family.”
One year later: 15 ways life has changed since the onset of the COVID pandemic “Fifteen Fortune staffers reported on some of the most significant ways in which our lives have been altered, and one lesson rings true: Virtually no one has been left untouched after 12 months of such dramatic disruption. A generous dose of empathy and understanding of that truth will make us all stronger as we rebuild and remake our world in the year ahead.”
In Their Own Words, Americans Describe the Struggles and Silver Linings of the COVID-19 Pandemic “Pew Research Center has been asking survey questions over the past year about Americans’ views and reactions to the COVID-19 pandemic. In August, we gave the public a chance to tell us in their own words how the pandemic has affected them in their personal lives. We wanted to let them tell us how their lives have become more difficult or challenging, and we also asked about any unexpectedly positive events that might have happened during that time.”
This week, we blogged that you need to honor the connection at the heart of all relationships. Here are some other writers on different aspects of this discussion.
Connection: At the Heart of any Good Relationship “In my experience, for relationships to really work, connections have to exist and develop on multiple levels. The extent to which these connections deepen and mature over time is likely to have a big bearing on the level of fulfillment the parties experience within the relationship.”
6 Heart-Centered Communication Tools to Strengthen Your Relationships “Communication is all about the heart. No matter how serious the conversation or the stakes involved, we want to connect, to understand, and be understood. A successful communication is so fulfilling because the separation between ourselves and the person we are speaking with softens or disappears entirely. We feel closer, more intimate, calmer, and less isolated. Who doesn’t want to communicate better?”
5 Tips to Recognize and Honor Your Needs in Relationships “We don’t learn to pay much attention to our needs, beyond the basics of food, water, and shelter. Television advertisements, popular culture, and the desires of others dictate our “needs.” But I’ll bet that, on a soul level, you don’t need a cooler car, a bigger ring, whiter teeth, or more parties. What do you need then? Answering this question can be one of the most powerful transformations of your life.”
Our blog this week was about ensuring that your relationship embraces sacred space, a time when the two of you are fully connected. Here are some other writings exploring aspects of this.
Sacred Space “At some point, we will all experience the ups and downs of being human. Feeling lost, being in love, confusion, wanting more, healing. Creating sacred space is one valuable tool that can support our everyday work of building lives of purpose and meaning. Sacred space provides an opportunity for us to explore the kind of person we want to be, what we believe, and why.”
Safe Space, Sacred Space — How to Stay Together “Sacred space is that sacrosanct condition where two people come together in innocence and openness in the name of love. Anything can happen in this space. Anything can be said in this space. Anything can be forgiven in this space. And, everything can be held in this space. It is this safe, sacred space that allows our hearts to bond, unite, and become one.”
Me, You, Us – Entering the Sacred Space of Co-creation “Intimacy is the coming together of two separate selves in a joint-effort creation: You and Me make Us. Something happens in that space of co-creation where intimacy happens, something invisible and magical, something sacred, spiritual in nature. A bridge is built, upon which there is a steady stream of energy flowing back and forth, an exchange of essences, where understanding and closeness are achieved, where an indestructible bond develops. Us is sacred, one of a kind, special and unique unto itself, just as You and Me are special and unique. Us becomes an entity unto itself and a source of vital nourishment.”