PHIL: Maude and I have been together for 16 years; my half-dozen previous relationships lasted no more than three. I described this to Maude on our second date, and she thought to herself that was because I hadn’t met her. …
Do You Want a Peaceful Relationship? Yes, You Can Have One! Read more »
PHIL: We have plenty in common, but also plenty of differences. How we connect socially. What we read. What our diets are. Our differences don’t cause us problems, but for many people, they are a perennial battlefield. Maggie Scarf proposed …
How To See Your Differences As Assets Rather Than Causing Arguments Read more »
We wrote about the increasing importance of relationships one year into the pandemic and asked people to share how the year was for them. We published some last week, and here, in part 2, are another four peoples’ responses on …
How People Are Feeling after a Year of Pandemic, Part 2 Read more »
Last week, we wrote about the increasing importance of relationships one year into the pandemic and this week, people are sharing how the year was for them. We’re grateful to all those who who wrote so intimately. Per Noah Webster, …
How Are People Feeling after a Year of Pandemic? Part 1 Read more »
We were in a Zoom meeting yesterday with a writing group talking about how we are feeling at this point in the pandemic and what we have been dealing with personally. It was a very open, warm sharing and everyone …
The Increasing Importance of Relationships a Year Into The Pandemic Read more »
Our culture is oriented around the individual. People (including us!) write about how to find yourself. Herbert Hoover famously used the phrase “rugged individualism.” Countless articles advise how to improve ourselves, whether at the gym, the makeup counter, or our …
Why is it Important not to Focus on Yourself in Relationships? Read more »
PHIL: We continually ask ourselves how we live so peacefully. We know that we do; the challenge is to turn that knowledge into reasons and words. One of the most fundamental aspects is the sense that we are each completely …
Why is it Important not to Focus on Relationship Differences? Read more »
Many of us have created daily routines to deal with these challenging times, developing many new ways to organize our time at home and with each other. For us, we have created a loving peaceful togetherness in the house. We …
PHIL: I want to talk this week about how we perceive the world. That might sound as if it has nothing to do with relationships, but they are an important part of our lives, and I’ll come to them later. …
How to Integrate Thoughts and Feelings in Your Life Read more »
MAUDE: When I first came to Santa Barbara, over forty years ago, my husband (at the time) and I had the address of only one person to make contact with. We had been given his address because we shared a …
How to Reach Unity When There Appear to be Two Sides Read more »