MAUDE: The cornerstone of peaceful conflict-free relating is the practice of mutuality: the certainty that it is possible to find mutual solutions and the act of creating them. This requires the ability to search beyond differences to find the matching …
Why is Mutuality Important in Your Relationships? Read more »
We often describe something we call total acceptance, but what do we actually mean by that term? Well, first let’s discuss what we don’t mean. We don’t mean that you should accept abuse or bullying or attempts at dominance. We …
PHIL: Last week we wrote about recognizing that each person is an individual with their own way of doing things, but of course, that brings up the question of what to do when differences arise in a relationship. It seems …
How to See Your Relationship in Terms of Important Core Values Read more »
One of the deepest and, yes sacred, parts of any relationship is the total mutual respect for each other’s individuality. Your partner – and everyone else – is different from you. You may think that is too obvious to even …
It’s Important to Honor Individuality in Your Relationships Read more »
In the last months, as we have written and shared how we and others are coping with these tumultuous times, something has become very clear. We get a strong response of agreement, empathy and understanding whenever we share personally about …
How to Think Differently About Your Relationships Read more »
PHIL: Welcome to the changed world. Buckle up; it’s currently a wild dystopian ride. The only way to enjoy it is to let go of any hope of earth returning to the way it was and find fascination and joy …
How to Transcend Today’s Turmoil with Inner Peace Read more »
This week Phil had a medical procedure. He needed a Covid-19 test early in the week, so we had to quarantine. It was so hot that we took our walks very early in the morning when few people were on …
Avoid Making Lists and Keeping Score in Your Relationships Read more »
PHIL: In one relationship, I felt that sex created intimacy, but my partner needed intimacy to precede sex. (This is what programmers call the bootstrap problem, from the expression “pull yourself up by your own bootstraps.” How do you read …
PHIL: Is your relationship a town with safe streets, no-go areas and places you might stumble and get hurt? We don’t live there. We simply don’t clash on things. It is totally improbable that we make the same choices time …
Why is Balance Important for Peaceful Relationships? Read more »
Critical to having a peaceful conflict-free relationship is an attitude we refer to as total acceptance. Understanding that the other person is a full and separate individual, with different ways of expressing themselves and unique preferences, is a necessary foundation …